My Template works best
on Mozilla Firefox and
Google Chrome, sorry :)
Back to Home
« »

ok.
i've pushed myself too hard these days.
i've been down too many times.
i've cried too many times.

yesterday, when everybody was busy b'cuz MBSA was spraying for the denggi thingy,
i sat on the swings.... and just feel the rush of the air through my hair, on my face...
feeling alil bit butterflies in my tummy. hehe its just like ur a lil kiddie again. playing without thinking about life or the world. its just u... and the swing..
as i closed my eyes, all that i hve been through for the past few months, just rewinds back.. i remember that nite. where it feels like i'm all alone in this world. i cried my heart and lungs out. i screamed. no body could hear it. i keep asking myself..., where did i go? i want my real smile back. i want to laugh for real. i want to be happy as i could. where is the girl that has been so independent these whole life? where did my real smile fade? where did my laugh gone to?

where

is

me??

it seems that, my will and strength is no where to be found. daddy said it was just a side effect from the dengue. yeah, frankly i am very weak these days. but that could never explain the pain that i feel in my chest.

i'm sorry friends, i'd promise to see u guys at sunway. but i didn't.
i'm not blaming anybdy for this. i still believe that everything happens for a reason. eventhou i can't see it yet.

you are right (you know who you are). i've been trying to please everybody out that i forgot myself. sumfing that i tot i cud do more to help, end up being a big stress that i cudn't even handle.
again, all my actions making me feel like i am a big stupid girl.

the day that i was looking forward didn't turn out the way it supposed to. and today, right now.
i open my eyes to all that had happen. its true, the more that your trying to please people, the more that your hurting them.

i'm ending this. i'm not gonna runaway. wuts done is done. the past can never be changed. wut i'm looking forward now, is the future. i may not be perfect for it. i may not be strong enough for it yet. but i'm ready for it. if i want to change sumfing, its gonna start from me.

i have to build myself again. picking up the pieces might be hard but its worth it to rise up.
it might not be perfect like it used to but its much better than before. its not empty anymore. its full of memories. thats wut i'm holding on to right now. the memories that i had with my loved ones. my life, all my life has been build by all of them. who i am now, is because of them.

i've realised that i've been putting too much hope on other ppl that i broke it on my own.
life isn't meant that way. i never meant it that way. all i need was just you to be by my side. and thats enough for me. but i guess i was too much.

don't worry, i might be still searching for that independent girl. but i'll be ok.
you always said that to me. and i believe you.
i believe that ill be fine. i'll be ok. if thats what you want me to say. cause i do.
real happiness doesn't come by itself. sacrifice has to be made. but i wouldn't mind sacrificing all i've got just to be myself again. ending of 2 december, minutes to midnight.

lets start all over again shall we? lets be like lil kiddie at kindergarten. i dunno u, u dunno me.
but we're holding hands. like we're bestfriends forever. :)


notes; - hppy birthday izzat. ur ten years old. just like powerpuff girls. haha (2 december)
- oh britney spears birthday is also on 2nd dec. haha izzat, ur birthday date is cool XD
- i've lost someone that i love ( 4th december 2008 )

ps: to you, i love you very much. no one can ever replace you.
i'm sorry for the things that i've done. i shouldn't taken you for granted. i'm grateful to get to be with you, eventhou just for a lil while. you were all that i need. nothing less, nothing more.
thank you for everything. i wish you all the best in life and happiness along the way.
your the bestest friend i've never had. no, you're more than that. you're my everything. and you will always be... i love you until the day i die...

Labels: dreams, my voice

Post a Comment

Wednesday, December 3, 2008 4:11 PM
Posted by — Fasya Ibrahim.

Back to Home
« »

ok.
i've pushed myself too hard these days.
i've been down too many times.
i've cried too many times.

yesterday, when everybody was busy b'cuz MBSA was spraying for the denggi thingy,
i sat on the swings.... and just feel the rush of the air through my hair, on my face...
feeling alil bit butterflies in my tummy. hehe its just like ur a lil kiddie again. playing without thinking about life or the world. its just u... and the swing..
as i closed my eyes, all that i hve been through for the past few months, just rewinds back.. i remember that nite. where it feels like i'm all alone in this world. i cried my heart and lungs out. i screamed. no body could hear it. i keep asking myself..., where did i go? i want my real smile back. i want to laugh for real. i want to be happy as i could. where is the girl that has been so independent these whole life? where did my real smile fade? where did my laugh gone to?

where

is

me??

it seems that, my will and strength is no where to be found. daddy said it was just a side effect from the dengue. yeah, frankly i am very weak these days. but that could never explain the pain that i feel in my chest.

i'm sorry friends, i'd promise to see u guys at sunway. but i didn't.
i'm not blaming anybdy for this. i still believe that everything happens for a reason. eventhou i can't see it yet.

you are right (you know who you are). i've been trying to please everybody out that i forgot myself. sumfing that i tot i cud do more to help, end up being a big stress that i cudn't even handle.
again, all my actions making me feel like i am a big stupid girl.

the day that i was looking forward didn't turn out the way it supposed to. and today, right now.
i open my eyes to all that had happen. its true, the more that your trying to please people, the more that your hurting them.

i'm ending this. i'm not gonna runaway. wuts done is done. the past can never be changed. wut i'm looking forward now, is the future. i may not be perfect for it. i may not be strong enough for it yet. but i'm ready for it. if i want to change sumfing, its gonna start from me.

i have to build myself again. picking up the pieces might be hard but its worth it to rise up.
it might not be perfect like it used to but its much better than before. its not empty anymore. its full of memories. thats wut i'm holding on to right now. the memories that i had with my loved ones. my life, all my life has been build by all of them. who i am now, is because of them.

i've realised that i've been putting too much hope on other ppl that i broke it on my own.
life isn't meant that way. i never meant it that way. all i need was just you to be by my side. and thats enough for me. but i guess i was too much.

don't worry, i might be still searching for that independent girl. but i'll be ok.
you always said that to me. and i believe you.
i believe that ill be fine. i'll be ok. if thats what you want me to say. cause i do.
real happiness doesn't come by itself. sacrifice has to be made. but i wouldn't mind sacrificing all i've got just to be myself again. ending of 2 december, minutes to midnight.

lets start all over again shall we? lets be like lil kiddie at kindergarten. i dunno u, u dunno me.
but we're holding hands. like we're bestfriends forever. :)


notes; - hppy birthday izzat. ur ten years old. just like powerpuff girls. haha (2 december)
- oh britney spears birthday is also on 2nd dec. haha izzat, ur birthday date is cool XD
- i've lost someone that i love ( 4th december 2008 )

ps: to you, i love you very much. no one can ever replace you.
i'm sorry for the things that i've done. i shouldn't taken you for granted. i'm grateful to get to be with you, eventhou just for a lil while. you were all that i need. nothing less, nothing more.
thank you for everything. i wish you all the best in life and happiness along the way.
your the bestest friend i've never had. no, you're more than that. you're my everything. and you will always be... i love you until the day i die...

Labels: dreams, my voice

Wednesday, December 3, 2008 4:11 PM
Posted by — Fasya Ibrahim.