i'm sick and tired of being sad.
it's not that i dont have friends.
i'm not alone.
it's just that i feel lonely. pathetic right ?
i have alot of friends that would probably slap my face right now if they find out that i didn't run to them when i'm feeling all blue like this.
i'm sorry my bitches.
sometimes, being all emo and sad just takes away your sense and makes you feel like you want to feel left out in this world.
i don't really feel like continuing with this post.
i mean, it's not like you've never felt what i am going through right now.
feels like everyone in this world blames you for everything.
feels like you are screaming so loud. so hard.. so bad.. but still not one person can hear you.
you're crying so hard that every time you breathe in air your lungs pushed it back out and your heart is like being ripped out slowly from your body that you don't feel like you're breathing at all.
it's beating so fast that you feel like you're living and dying at the same time.
you end up, bringing your hands close to your face asking yourself, what am i doing here ? why am i feeling this terrible pain ?
why am i suffering ?
whoa! talk about emotional.
i end up telling you how i feel actually.
well bits of it.
to feel that way..
or should i say, to feel how i feel right now..
is it ? is it normal ?
at least i know that i'm already used to this.
heh what a liar, i'm such a liar.
maybe acai is right.
i am a liar.
i strongly believe i'm not a liar.
just because i don't tell people or be honest with myself, doesnt mean i'm a liar.
i mean, whats the freaking point anyway ?
whats the point of ME telling how i really feel when i know in the end it'll all come back to me ?
"you have to think thoroughly. maybe its your fault that you got yourself into this.
"you're selfish, you keep making mistakes and now you're pointing fingers at others."
"you're so immature. crying over something. it won't help anything. you need keep yourself calm."
oh and my 'FAVOURITE' one.
"aww, i know how you feel."
it's there any point of saying that ?
*sending a msg*
well that was a long msg.
you're probably asleep right now.
i just hope.. when you read it.. you won't be mad at me..
i have nothing else to say.
or should i say, there's nothing else that i can say.
all i know, it's just not fair.
it's not fair when someone people can hurt my feelings but i can't.
it's not fair that you can be mad at me, but i can't.
it's not fair that i'm always the one to be blame.
ps; this pain will never go away.
Posted by — Fasya Ibrahim.